Even if you have a feeling that the bonds you’ve made with your family aren’t always healthy, you may not have noticed that your family has toxic dynamics. For example, have you ever gone to therapy to talk about a family member and how their life has affected you? Or do you think that some of your fears have first and last names and are related to you? Well, things like this can happen when a family has toxic dynamics.
To avoid this, it’s important to first figure out if your family has toxic dynamics. After all, no family is perfect or always happy, but to know when it’s no longer healthy, we need to look at some specific factors, which we can try with these seven signs:
You feel invisible
If you feel like your family doesn’t care about your needs, it can hurt your self-esteem and confidence a lot. This is a sign of a toxic family dynamic. If you feel like no one cares about you or listens to you, if you didn’t have anyone to play with as a child, or if there isn’t good communication and quality time between family members today, this could be a sign. You can deal with this by doing things with your family and asking them to care more about you.
You feel stressed
Have you ever worried that you might not be what they want you to be? This can also be caused by a toxic family, because you might be afraid of letting them down because of all the expectations they have of you, even if you’re not aware of it. Pay attention to this point if you worry about not being the best at something, if you quit your hobbies because you’re not good at them, or if you don’t set limits because you don’t want to be a pain. You can make this better by looking for ways to find love in your loved ones that don’t depend on what you do.
You think that they don’t get you
You may have tried to tell your family what you need, but you don’t feel like they understand or support you. This can be very bad for your self-esteem. At this point, we think you should think about going to family therapy and bringing someone with you to help improve your relationships. You can also find things you both like to do and do them together.
You think they only care about what you can give them
In a family, it’s best to know that you are loved for who you are, not for what you can give. If you know that when a relative looks for you, it’s because he wants something from you and not because he’s interested in you, you may be in a toxic relationship. We suggest that you don’t give more than you can, and that you set limits so that people don’t only look for you for that reason.
You feel like you have to go see them
When things are going well with our families, seeing them is exciting and good, not the opposite. If you always feel bad when you see a family member, something is probably wrong. Think about what makes you feel this way, and even if it’s hard to accept, remember that you can walk away from a relationship that hurts you.
They don’t treat you well
This happens a lot when parents are getting a divorce or when a couple isn’t happy and, for example, blames the problems on the kids. Try not to take these kinds of attacks to heart, and remember that what goes on at home is not your fault.
You always feel sad when you’re around him
We all have days when we feel a little more down and sad, and that’s normal. But if you always feel this way when you’re with your family but not with other people in your life, it could mean that you have a bad relationship with them. The problem with toxic relationships is that we can get so used to them that we don’t realize how much they hurt us. This is why it’s important to pay attention to your feelings and act on them.